what a bland goodbye

I cannot erase the memory of laying in your room
Candlelight burning as we whispered sweet nothings
Limbs entangled with smudged mascara
I didn’t care about my messy hair
The memory of your room haunts me
Your ghost doesn’t care that I’m not there
Nothing is ever casual to me
Never ordinary
Never just a feeling
Never just a fling
I feel everything to it’s full extent and I hate that you know that about me
You showed parts of me that I’ve never seen before and I am grateful but so angry that you aren’t around anymore
Nothing about what we had was ordinary
But god what a dull goodbye
You hugged me and I didn’t shed a tear until you were no longer in sight
The reality that I will never lay peacefully in your bed again kicks in and I am alone walking home to the place I know I don’t belong